Her Highness, Seductress
by lilacmoons
Summary: Princess Kendra is sick of the boring roles and rules that come with being royalty, what better way to rebel than seduce all her King's men? And more. (A.K.A. Kenny doesn't give a fuck and sleeps with everyone)
1. Prologue

**Authors Note:** The sinning begins. I'm getting back into writing and I need to reign in my smut skills again. I figure writing a chaptered fic featuring different elements of the sexy times, as well as different characters I'm not used to writing will help me improve gradually. If anyone would like to take the time to review this, I'd love some suggestions for characters/scenarios to be featured in future chapters! (Although I should note I'm not open to writing Cartman, or any of the shows adults in smutty scenes)

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 **Her Highness, Seductress**

The Princess huffed a frustrated sigh as she stared down at the busy courtyard from her tower. "It's so very _dull_ being a Princess" she mused softly, weaving her fingers through her hair in boredom. Being the only child of the King of Kupa Keep the Princess had always been treated as a delicate little flower, to be admired by her people, though never to be among them. Apart from royal balls that is, in which she was treated as a decorative centerpiece among the King's Court.

However, there was one exception to this. Every seven days Kendra's father granted permission to go down to military training grounds, where she would observe her father's knights and warriors preparing for battle as a source of entertainment. Though the princess adored this brief freedom, with her visits came a sense of conflict. On one hand these experiences made her quite jealous, as future leader she too wanted to fight for her kingdom, contributing to a worthy cause while ensuring her citizens prosperity. On the other hand it was certainly the highlight of her week. She had such little to do between these visits (In her free time her "schedule", if you could call it that, largely consisted of pestering the servants, taking walks in her private garden, and pleasuring herself in her chambers) she found great enjoyment in simply being around so many other, unique people, let alone the excitement in watching them spar and hone their weapons. In fact, more often than not she ended up cursing this same excitement as it quickly provoked a string of indecent thoughts a lady of her status should not be having. Thoughts that caused her eyes to wonder and body to grow flushed with want.

With gazing at her father's men for hours being her only stimuli, it wasn't hard for Her Highness to come up with all sorts of risqué fantasies that would serve to entertain her at a later date. One of her favourites she had concocted was a scenario in which she joined them in the battlegrounds, showing off her spectacular fighting skills and leaving the men in awe. They would be impressed and more importantly, incredibly, undeniably aroused by her skill and elegance. Perhaps they would pursue her? Offer her trinkets or better yet, their own bare bodies for the taking? Perhaps some would seek to impress her as she had them, putting on a show of their own erotic skinship for her pleasure? (Oh, she'd simply adore seeing that blonde barbarian become putty in Feldspar's hands). She swallowed heavily, her bloomers growing tight at the thought. The princess exhaled shakily, growing uncomfortable in a variety of ways. This was getting ridiculous.

Princess Kendra knew she couldn't leave these desires unfulfilled; it just wasn't in her nature. And she had already had her fill of the willing servants she had managed to charm into her chambers, unbeknownst to the King of course. And the way she saw it, satisfying her needs and experiencing life outside the castle was well worth the risk of her father's rage and reputation. Kendra smirked at how unfitting her priorities were of a royal, in actuality the risk and sheer naughtiness of it all added to the thrill in her plans.

She giggled to herself, gazing down at her father's men once more before throwing in a flirtatious wink for good measure.

"Can't wait to get better acquainted with you boys"

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 **Authors note:** And there's the pro-log! I have another 4 chapters in mind (or rather another 4 pairings, and some vague scenarios planned) so far but we'll see what happens. As I mentioned I haven't written in several years, so I'd really appreciate some constructive criticism! Thanks for reading~


	2. Sword Play

**Authors Note:** A couple notes on this, 1) I've tried to avoid it as best I could but since I've made how the characters speak reminiscent of the era (for the most part) they probably do seem a bit OOC, Kenny in particular. 2) As you may be able to tell, I have no idea how to write Clyde. But if you think that's gonna stop me from writing this sorry excuse for swords puns you are mistaken.

 **Chapter summary:** Princess Kendra visits the Armoury to discuss... swords.

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 **Sword Play**

Kendra moved swiftly through the castles halls and corridors, holding her dress as to not trip in her haste. Despite her rush, there was no real need for the Princess to hurry. After all on this particular day of the week she was escorted by her father's servants to the training grounds. Lest she somehow fall into peril on her own. "Being the delicate maiden I am" the princess scoffed sarcastically at the thought.

But unlike previous occasions Kendra had a goal in mind. A goal she could not let the King's guards guess, as they might if they were to see the devilish quirk in her lips or the skip in her step. With excitement, she quickened her step, her slippers clacking against the stone floor as she went. In seemingly no time she reached the courtyard which gave way to the Kingdom's warrior's training grounds. Kupa Keep's training ground was a large, but modest, dirt arena. There were several tents and closed off areas that lined the arena. Kendra could only assume they were used for housing weapons and armor, or trinkets won in battle. Though a medic station would make sense as well, she added as an afterthought. Despite her status, the men paid little mind to her presence. In fact they didn't acknowledge her at all really, too busy going about their own business.

Kendra liked that. She had long grown tired of her personal servant's over-protectiveness. Kendra loved attention, yes, but she wanted to earn it. And earn it she would. With this in mind she moved closer to the men, who had begun to form a circle around a sparring duo. While the majority of the men had their eyes focused on the fight, Kendra noticed a lone brunette watching from a stall in the corner. He had short, brown hair that fell in waves across his face, and over-all was pretty decent looking. By the objects surrounding him, the princess guessed he was the keeper of the armory. Picking up her lilac skirt, Kendra traipsed towards the stall, a wry smile etched across her otherwise innocent features.

"Oh uh good day Your Highness" The boy bowed his head as she walked towards him. He must have been around Kendra's age she realized.

"Good day Sir…?" The princess began, feigning an unusual polite tone.

"Clyde. Perhaps you have heard of my deeds at the Battle of Stark's Pond?" The boy, Clyde, questioned in a haughty, yet nasal tone. The Princess blinked at the remark. "Um anyway, what brings you to my shop, Princess?" Clyde asked in a casual manner. Anyone else would have found such familiarity when speaking to a royal extremely rude. But Kendra figured it was likely he was just an idiot.

"Oh I was just visiting, as I do, but I must say your wares have caught my eye." The Princess smiled in what she hoped was a charming, yet sultry manner. She had been practicing after all. "You see, I'm very interested in weaponry as of late" she giggled. It wasn't a complete lie. Kendra was actually very interested in the art of war and had her own collection of fine blades to prove it. She was just interested in a different type of sword recently.

"Oh, well in that case I can show you some swords and stuff if you want?"

'I would love to see your sword and stuff. Or rather, stuff your sword in- wait. Not yet' Clyde remained oblivious to the royal's inner monologue, as she positioned her hair to cover her flushing cheeks. Clearing her throat the Princess answered "I would very much enjoy that, shall we?" she nodded to the tent behind the stall, which housed the majority of the larger weapons and shields. Without waiting for an answer, the blonde headed into the tent, drawing it closed when Clyde followed suit, before observing some of the weaponry.

Still none the wiser to his companion's intentions, the shopkeeper traveled to the back of the tent to analyze his wares. He returned a moment later with a magnificent blade and placed it on the work bench in front of them, stepping back to admire it with the princess. It was a fine sword indeed, Kendra thought. With a long, steady handle and shining length, it would surely be handy in battle.

"So uh this is a Longsword, this is actually the only one in the Armory 'cause they're super popular among the Kingdom's knights" Clyde explained, his words carrying a tinge of jealousy. "I mean, it is really cool though, see it's handle is a lot longer than most swords so you have to wield it with both hands". He made a show of wrapping his smooth looking hands around the thick base of the sword, which did indeed cover it from hilt to blade. With her priorities the way they were, the Princess couldn't help but imagining him repeating that action somewhere else. "But that's kind of a good thing since it helps you deliver a lot of force to your thrust"

Kendra worked hard to fight the chuckle trying to escape her lips, and instead nodded sagely, as if truly reflecting on this information. "Ah yes, that does sound like an admirable trait for a weapon. I've always valued good, hard thrusting. Of swords" she finished, stepping closer, awaiting his response.

Clyde stared at the Princess for a second, trying to gage whether that was intentional or not. Spending as much time as he did with his fellow warriors the shopkeeper was no stranger to sword jokes. But he never would have expected such remarks from royalty and a lady at that. Especially Princess Kendra, the fairest maiden in the land. Possibly ever, if the Kingdom was to be believed. No, it must be his dirty mind making these assumptions. After all it had been such a long time since he had shared a bed with someone.

"Uhhh, yeah me too, it's pretty important in battle." Clyde coughed, eyes darting anywhere but the princess. Had she always been this close? He could have sworn there was at least a foot or two between them when he had first brought out the sword. Yet now the two were practically side by side. 'Damn hormones' he cursed inwardly, 'This is what I get for spending all my time with guys'.

"Yes very, I would say the most important aspect, really. Although I suppose speed is a valuable asset as well". Princess Kendra's delicate fingers glided across the blade as she spoke.

"Oh yeah definitely, but a longsword wouldn't be any good for that. For speed, you'd be better off with a dagger, or some kind of smaller curved blade." Said Clyde, who was doing his best to keep the conversation sounding technical, lest his body react to more of the Princesses "unintentionally" sultry words.

'Huh, like Butters. I guess the same physics carry over' The royal mused inwardly. "So it's true then, it's not the size of the sword that counts, but what you do with it?" the Princess found great pleasure in watching the man grow noticeably flustered by her words.

"Well yeah, all swords have their own strengths and weaknesses."

"Oh I know that too well Clyde" Kendra sighed, before realizing she had spoken that remark out loud. Shit. She was supposed to be playing the role of a delicate, innocent, little flower so her grand reveal would be all the more enticing. Oh well, she was growing impatient anyway. "So would it be correct to assume the smaller blades find their strength in swiftness and precision, but the larger cover more ground and thrust with more force?" she recovered quickly from her blunder, forgoing her self-assigned role to give into her want.

"That's right, Your Highness"

"And may I ask, what kind of sword do you have?" She questioned in a soft, seemingly innocent tone. While absentmindedly bringing her hand to his hips, dragging it gently across the sheath that held his own rapier.

"Uh. What" Despite popular belief, Clyde was no fool. He was almost certain the Princess was making advances on him, what with her close proximity and snake-like hands dancing across his torso. He glanced down at his actual sword, then his sword, which had begun to twitch hopefully under her touch.

"I think I should like to see your personal sword, Clyde" She whispered in a low tone, finally moving her hand from Clyde's hips to cup her prize. 'Oh, that is a long sword'.

"P-princess!" Clyde exclaimed. He couldn't say he was completely surprised. There had been rumors of the Princess seducing servants into her private room. But Clyde figured those were just lewd fantasies created by his fellow warriors to keep them entertained. He couldn't say he hadn't thoroughly entertained the thought either. But to be experiencing it was another matter entirely! He wasn't complaining though, he was not complaining in the slightest.

Kendra pressed her palm harder into Clyde's bulge, eliciting a pleasured hum, before beginning to rub him at a steady pace. "You like that?" she breathed into his ear, before biting at the lobe, drawing a shaky sigh and nod from the shop keeper. Between several satisfied huffs and sighs, it wasn't long before Clyde grew completely erect under her touch.

"Ah-haaaah… yeah" he gasped, rolling his hips forward into the warmth of her palm.

The princess giggled quietly at his enthusiasm, her head still pressed to Clyde's neck. She had honestly been expecting more of a fight, what with the whole 'innocent damsel' act she had bothered to put on. She had at least expected some kind of 'No Your Highness, we mustn't! You're a beautiful Princess and I'm just a lowly shopkeep! Blah blah blah' type scenario to play out. She didn't mind that much though, dick was dick, no matter how the foreplay pans out. With this in mind, she moved her hand to the belt of her partners' trousers, undoing the belt and buttons with expertise. "Shall we engage in a little sword play of our own?" the Princess questioned in her most sultry voice, finally slipping in her hand to grasp at Clyde's hard length.

"Mmmm.." Clyde hummed in relief at the skin to skin contact. Getting a handjob from Princess Kendra hadn't been on his schedule, but once again, he was not complaining. The blonde moved her hand up and down at an agonizingly slow pace, pausing every now and then to press her finger into the slit. Which drew low, albeit nasal, moans from the boy. Pre-cum began to pool at the head of Clyde's dick until Kendra swiped some away with her finger, taking her hand from the brunette's pants to suck the digit into her mouth, batting her eyes as she did. Clyde leaned forward, anticipating a kiss, but the Princess moved a few steps back from him. The boy was confused by the rejection, until he noticed Kendra reaching behind her to pull down the zip of her dress.

"Fuck" he rasped, quickly pulling out his cock to stroke it with vigor. Little did the Princess know (though she might have been presumptuous enough to assume, the self-proclaimed 'charming seductress' she was) Clyde had fantasized about this situation just as much as she had, possibly more. He watched silently, his mouth watering, as the princess slid her gown to the waist to reveal her surprisingly petite form. Where were the prized double D's that were said to enchant men to do her bidding? The dirty rumors about the royal had always boasted the size of her most valuable asset. The shop keeper continued to ponder this until the royal finally slid her dress past her hips and onto the ground. The lilac gown dropped to the floor to reveal a sizable bulge, barely contained by her sweet, pastel pink panties. The hand stroking his cock abruptly stopped, brown eyes widened in shock to see the rosy head of her dick spring free from the lace confines, as her panties joined the dress on the dirt floor. The rumors had been true alright- sort of. In any case the Princess' anatomy certainly was… large.

Smirking widely, the seductress moved back towards Clyde, hips swaying, and dick bobbing lewdly as she walked. "So… You've got a sword... I've got a sword." She made a show of fisting her cock slowly, still smiling devilishly, and keeping her eyes locked with his. That is until those same, seemingly mesmerized, eyes dropped to follow her actions. Eyes that held so much confusion and lust in equal parts. "Shall we duel?"

Kendra didn't give him any time to answer as she bumped the tip of her length to his, forcing the brunette from his reverie and causing his breath to stutter. Once again she grabbed for his hips, maneuvering them to hers again and again so their arousals came together in the most delicious way. Kendra pistoned her body forward seeking the warmth and friction the movement created, groaning in pleasure when Clyde started to meet her thrusts. Yeah, Clyde was still kind of weirded out. But this was still hot as hell, he decided, grabbing the royal's hips and pushing her back against the bench behind them, vigorously rubbing their dicks together. He leaned forward once more, beginning to suckle the milky flesh of her neck as they thrust together.

"Oh... that's it. Mhmm.. touch my chest too" She commanded, breath hitching as he did her bidding. The princess bit her lip, her brows pinching together in pleasure. 'Fuck this is good… but- not enough' she decided, halting her movement to wrap her hand around the both of them. She could feel the brunette start to throb, and though he wasn't exactly the most vocal, she could tell he was getting close.

Clyde grunted into the blonde's neck, with her hot hand fisting them tightly paired with the feeling of another hard cock pressing against his own, he knew he would not last much longer. He began to moan lowly as the Princess picked up her pace and tightened her grip around them, before remembering his comrades were still only mere steps from the armory. "Look at you" she panted, their labored breaths mingling. "Such a mess for me…" she trailed off, looking down at the beads of pre-come trickling down their lengths. When Princess Kendra's ministrations grew too much he bit into her shoulder, muffling what would have been a loud groan of pleasure, and spilling his seed onto her hand and the both of them.

The man slumped forward in a brief fit of exhaustion, breathing heavily into her highness' sweet smelling locks. When he had calmed down he looked up to find the princess staring at him with a pleased, yet somewhat pained expression. The source of discomfort was obvious.

Kendra grabbed for Clyde's hand, bringing it to her mouth and lapping at it before placing it onto her length. "Go on…" She huffed desperately, her face was flushed with want, and her hips thrusted forward into the loose fist he made on instinct. "Serve your Princess". Clyde didn't know why that turned him on so much, but he was far too gone at this point to do anything but obey her command. He tightened his grip around her, beginning to stroke as she had to him, her 'lubricant' adding to the pleasure. Before he knew it the Princess had thrown her head back, a string of fowl curses falling from her open lips. Clyde no longer cared if his friends heard the commotion coming from the armory. In fact he wanted them to hear. He wanted them to know he had made Princess Kendra, the most desired maiden in all the land, come.

With this in mind, he reached his other hand down to fondle the Princess' sack as he quickened the pace of his strokes. A wet sound emanating from his hand when beads of pre-come started trickling from her slit.

"Ah! Ye-yesssss. Fuck!" She exclaimed, pushing into his hand one, two, three more times, before coming with a loud cry that Clyde would store in his memory the lonely nights ahead. He watched her wind down from her orgasm, an expression of what could only be pure bliss painted across her face. While her chest rose and fell.

After she had caught her breath, Kendra pushed her new lover back a step, so she could walk around him to retrieve her dress. Oh she hoped it hadn't got too dirty amongst their fun. It hadn't, thankfully, and she dressed almost as quickly as she had taken it off, repeatedly glancing at the shadows on the tent to gage how much time had passed. The King would grow suspicious soon.

Kendra stepped closer to Clyde again, who seemed to still be in awe of the whole situation, staring with glazed eyes at his wet hand. Shaking her head in amusement, the Princess tilted his chin up to give him a deep kiss, pulling away before either of them could get excited again. Still in a daze, Clyde followed her lips, almost tripping as she moved away from him, and left the tent.

Peeking her head back in, the Princess stole his attention once more. "Thanks for that, I truly do love swordsmanship" Kendra smiled, a mischievous twinkle in her eyes. "Perhaps I'll provide a sheath for your longsword the next time we meet, hm? I do look forward to battling with you again, Sir Clyde" .

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 **Authors Note:** Well. That was.. something. Too much plot? Not enough plot? (i mean the whole plot was literally 'hey teach me about swords ;)' 'k' *handjobs*) Idk, I tried my best but it's hard to write good smut. For that reason, reviews/constructive criticism is very much appreciated ;))))))))) Thanks for reading!


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